God Responds to Lawsuit

You don’t pull on Superman’s cape, you don’t spit into the wind, you don’t pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger, and you don’t mess with the Big Guy upstairs…

God apparently responds to lawsuit
By NATE JENKINS, Associated Press Writer

LINCOLN, Neb. – God has apparently responded to a lawsuit filed by a Nebraska lawmaker, and one of the filings seems to have dropped in from the heavens. “This one miraculously appeared on the counter. It just all of a sudden was here — poof!” said John Friend, clerk of the Douglas County District Court in Omaha.

The response was one of at least two to a lawsuit filed against God last week by state Sen. Ernie Chambers of Omaha, the state’s longest-serving lawmaker.

Signed by “God,” the response filed Wednesday argues the defendant is immune from some earthly laws and the court lacks jurisdiction over God.

Blaming the Almighty for human oppression and suffering misses an important point, it says.

“I created man and woman with free will and next to the promise of immortal life, free will is my greatest gift to you,” according to the response, as read by Friend.

St. Michael the Archangel is listed as a witness, Friend said.

Another response — also signed God — says the Lord disputes Chambers’ allegations.

That filing lists a phone number for a Corpus Christi law office. A message left for that office was not immediately returned Thursday.

Chambers could not be reached Thursday to comment on the response. He said in his five-page lawsuit that God has made terroristic threats against him and his constituents, inspired fear and caused “widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth’s inhabitants.”

He’s seeking a permanent injunction against God.

The self-proclaimed agnostic who often criticizes Christians said his filing was triggered by a federal lawsuit against a judge, filed by a woman who was barred from saying “rape,” “victim” and other words in court.

Chambers said the woman’s lawsuit is inappropriate because the Nebraska Supreme Court has already considered the case and federal courts follow the decisions of state supreme courts on state matters.

Chambers said his lawsuit is serious but also makes a point: Anybody can sue anybody.

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On the Net:

Douglas County District Court: http://www.dc4dc.com/index.php

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