Galactic Illegal Aliens headed for Bama

Ok, so this story is not about muslim crazies or political crazies but I think everyone will enjoy it.

By Leada Gore, 24 September, 2008, Clanton Advertiser

Attention Alabama residents – you are about to make history.
-Go Bama! – Beat Alburn! (sorry I couldn’t help myself)

Just in case you missed it, an Australian psychic has predicted aliens will be visiting the Earth Oct. 14. The psychic goes by the name “Blossom Goodchild,” and predicts a group called the Galactic Federation of Light will make a benevolent visit to our planet on that day. It seems they will bring their giant space ship close enough to Earth so a large majority of the population will get a bird’s eye view of the visitors. And, at least according to Goodchild, the aliens will be making our state their home base.
-That was close Florida already has a problem with illegals.

Goodchild’s news has the Internet all abuzz. There are plenty of comments about the aliens themselves, as well as numerous comments about their choice of destination.

“Alabama?” one person wrote. “I’ll bet Denver is jealous.”
-I spek a few good old boys will treat the green fellas to a little home made lightnen. Which is why they picked Bama over Denver

“Alabama?” another person said. “How will you be able to tell the difference from the people who actually live there?”
-The aliens will have on silver colored flannel shirts and hats.

And my favorite.

“Alabama?” they wrote. “This proves that 97 percent of aliens are Lynyrd Skynyrd fans.”
-I’m startin to like them green fellas myself.

Are you serious? I can think of lots of reasons why the aliens would choose Alabama. There’s Dreamland BBQ, the Space and Rocket Center in Huntsville, the boll weevil monument in Enterprise and, at least if you listen to Birmingham’s mayor, we will one day host the Olympics.
-Now y’all know I am always up for some pulled pork BBQ and a cold beer, if I have to sit with a Galactic Illegal Aliens then that’s what I’d do. We southerners are all about hospitality.

And, unlike some of those other places, you can land your UFO here, run down to the Piggly Wiggly for a Moon Pie and RC and make it back to the mother ship in time to catch the ‘Bama game on Saturday. Or, if you are the outdoorsy alien sort, deer season isn’t too far away, and nothing says “explorer from another planet” more than sitting in a tree stand on a cold autumn morning.
-I don’t hunt no more but If them Bama boys can’t find a buck, I’m sure I could arrange a huntin trip down here in Florida.

Goodchild’s prediction isn’t really anything new. There have been numerous such assertions through the years and, as far as we know, none have ever come true.

And we’ve all seen the movies – “Independence Day,” “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” and “E.T.” – featuring visiting creatures, both friendly and not, and their time spent here.

But who knows? Maybe this one will be the real thing. Maybe aliens really will visit us in October and use Alabama as their base of operations for this friendly drop-in.
-Long as they don’t decide to stay and apply for welfare they should be welcome.

But I will tell you this – I believe aliens will land in Alabama Oct. 14 before I believe Birmingham will host the Olympics. That, my friends, is an idea that’s really out of this world.

Leada Gore is the publisher of The Hartselle Enquirer.

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