The Recession Is So Bad… “How Bad Is It?” It’s So Bad That…

I saw this in the comments section of a Yahoo News article and had a good laugh.  So, I thought I’d share it with everyone:

From:  SpaceKowboy1965:
Recession

The recession has hit everybody really hard…
My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
Wives are having sex with their husbands because they can’t afford batteries.

CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

I saw a Mormon with only one wife.

If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.

Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.

Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.

My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .

A picture is now only worth 200 words.

When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.

The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.

And, finally….
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.

Explore posts in the same categories: Economy, humor

5 Comments on “The Recession Is So Bad… “How Bad Is It?” It’s So Bad That…”

  1. islams not for me Says:

    The rescession is so bad…

    I saw the wealthy begging for change… Oh wait they already do that in NYC…

    (So much for a career in stand up)
    🙂

  2. Gonzo Says:

    The economy is so bad, I saw the CEO of Wal-Mart shopping at Wal-Mart.

    The economy is so bad, I went to my bank the other day and the teller handed me a note saying, “This is a robbery!”

    The economy is so bad that African television stations are showing ‘Sponsor an American Child’ commercials!

    It’s so bad, Snoop Dogg had to start eating regular brownies.

    The economy is so bad, Bill Gates had to switch to dial up

    The economy is so bad, my ATM gave me an IOU!

    The economy is so bad that the highest-paying job in town is jury duty.

    The economy is so bad I saw a man in Costco buying one roll of toilet paper.

    The economy is so bad that even people who aren’t in Barack Obama’s cabinet aren’t paying taxes.

    The economy is so bad that I saw someone using the sun to get a tan!

    The economy is so bad, Hot Wheels stock is trading higher than GM.

    The economy is so bad, Barack Obama unveiled his plan to close Guantanamo Bay for good: He’s turning it into a bank!

    It’s so bad, I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”

    The economy is so bad, my niece told me she wants to dress up as a 401-K for Halloween so that she can turn invisible.

    The economy is so bad, people are standing behind George W Bush wherever he goes hoping for free shoes.

  3. tgusa Says:

    The economy is so bad that many of our people can’t even pay attention.


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